When Death Is Close

Blog Post created by 1404524 Employee on Dec 10, 2014

   Death is something many want to avoid even thinking about, yet, it happens to all, death of their physical body, that is. I find it seems to have a shy personality, and does not like to talk much about itself. It is around me, at work in a nursing home, in my everyday life, with friends and family members, and on the media or entertainment venues frequently.

   Death, for me, is sometimes annoying, simply because I do not understand it, it does not make any sense. I watch nature go through the seasons, and see death important for new life, but, this is not the case with a pet or loved one. It seems that so much is lost, and becomes meaningless when death is the final experience.

    I do however, have other thoughts and feelings about death, and these are the ones I know are real. I do know the spirit, the energy of a person, life, does not stop, when the physical body ceases to have juices run through it. I know, because, I feel it in myself. I sense a connection to all life, the universe, the creator, and I know, that is another part of me, that is real, even if invisible.

   I can not say what happens, when a heart stops beating, but, I know there is more. This becomes something less to fear, when I remember, as a baby in the womb, I did not know what would happen with birth, but, it was not the end of me. I believe we go though many of these sorts of huge changes, and that something that makes this all so exciting.

   Part of the spiritual work I do for myself, is to quite my overactive fears that seem to flow in at times like butter on a hot day. I find it better not to try to tell myself these fears are stupid, but, to take a moment and reconnect with all by my breath and thoughts of gratitude. This works for many problems that spring up on me, and is able to tame the big one too. Humor is another tool that probably makes me seem like an insane person at times, but, at least, I am having fun, and that is so much better than being frightened to the point of feeling frozen and unable to do anything.

    Death also is becoming a friend, like the elusive butterflies whom I see, but, rarely allow me to touch them. I have had them land right on my arm, and I will even say right in my heart, and so, we, death and I, are slowly getting to know one another. I know, death is actually always sitting with me, dancing with me, watching the sunset with me. I think, perhaps, death would like me to rename it, and so, with that idea, I will have to go ponder, to find the name.          (this work belongs to the sole owner of Jodie Silbaugh and is not allowed to be published or used in any manner without permission 1292014)